"So what’s the 'new size'? It’s yours! The one that gets you through the day, carries the groceries, hugs the people you love, and lets you live in your body with a little more softness — inside and out." - another thing to remember for all of us! 👍👍
I am not part of a gay tribe, but I can confidently say everyone finds their body aging as time goes by. Try to be comfortable in your body and do what you can to age gracefully.
Ohh My. Someone else concerned about.....What! "Ohh I'm too fat."; "Ohhh I'm too old!"; "Ohh I don't look like an Abercrombie & Fitch model." I can't help but smile. When I came out, in the late Jurassic era, (forty or so years ago) there were many 'types' that most Gay men aspired to. Clone, twink, leather queen etc. etc. Many of us wanted to be (usually) who we wanted to sleep with. Then, AIDS came along, and people were too busy trying to stay alive to really care about these superficial things. I mean, on some level we still did, but, it was kind of far down the list of priorities. When I met my Partner in the early nineties, things were getting better, but we still faced fears (as a community) of death, of DOMA, (remember DOMA?) discrimination, and all the other roadblocks put in our way by an uncaring Society and indifferent Universe. Now, I haven't dated in a long time, and I don't think I ever will again. But, when you get older, whether you are partnered or not, there are a couple of truths that you can not escape. Firstly, no matter how hard you try, no matter how many pills, potions, surguries, whatever; YOU ARE STILL GOING TO AGE, and secondly, YOU ARE STILL GOING TO DIE. A daunting idea for most people of any age or orientation.
What is a girl to do? Well, I suggest looking at yourself on the inside. The quickest way to get friends (or lovers for that matter) is to be one yourself. No one is one hundred percent every day, so give yourself a break. How you interact with other humans will determine and define, how you live, weather you yourself are happy, and ultimately (if you are lucky and persistent) a mate. I wish I was young and thin and (relatively) handsome again. I see guys sometimes and think "OMG I would love to get to know him." Then I remember I'm old enough to be his Grandfather! Talk about a reality check! If you want friends, be a friend; if you want a lover, be loving yourself. Whatever (or whoever) you do, do it with kindness and love and I assure you that happiness and YOUR Prince (or Princess) Charming will come as surely as tomorrow's dawn.
As I older gay person I grew up in a post AIDS generation world were most of the generation before me passed away but the legacy they left was one of sexual liberation and excess to some extent. Labels like bear, otter, twink, passing, gender fuck etc… were common and placed people in roles. Today people are placed in roles like masculinity roles like bottom or top mostly and I see daddy applied to guys in their 20’s and the term use to mean an older more mature male. So terms really mean nothing now because they have become confused and misunderstood over time and are only meaningful in a sexual context. Once outside of that context, once you find your person then those terms do not mean as much as they once did unless you’re living an open lifestyle or on the DL. People are just people and if you are open to others you might find out you have things in common and might become friends or more over time. Just random thoughts here.
"So what’s the 'new size'? It’s yours! The one that gets you through the day, carries the groceries, hugs the people you love, and lets you live in your body with a little more softness — inside and out." - another thing to remember for all of us! 👍👍
You guys are great! ♥️ ♥️
thanks, Jim!!! xoxo
I am not part of a gay tribe, but I can confidently say everyone finds their body aging as time goes by. Try to be comfortable in your body and do what you can to age gracefully.
amen to this!
Ohh My. Someone else concerned about.....What! "Ohh I'm too fat."; "Ohhh I'm too old!"; "Ohh I don't look like an Abercrombie & Fitch model." I can't help but smile. When I came out, in the late Jurassic era, (forty or so years ago) there were many 'types' that most Gay men aspired to. Clone, twink, leather queen etc. etc. Many of us wanted to be (usually) who we wanted to sleep with. Then, AIDS came along, and people were too busy trying to stay alive to really care about these superficial things. I mean, on some level we still did, but, it was kind of far down the list of priorities. When I met my Partner in the early nineties, things were getting better, but we still faced fears (as a community) of death, of DOMA, (remember DOMA?) discrimination, and all the other roadblocks put in our way by an uncaring Society and indifferent Universe. Now, I haven't dated in a long time, and I don't think I ever will again. But, when you get older, whether you are partnered or not, there are a couple of truths that you can not escape. Firstly, no matter how hard you try, no matter how many pills, potions, surguries, whatever; YOU ARE STILL GOING TO AGE, and secondly, YOU ARE STILL GOING TO DIE. A daunting idea for most people of any age or orientation.
What is a girl to do? Well, I suggest looking at yourself on the inside. The quickest way to get friends (or lovers for that matter) is to be one yourself. No one is one hundred percent every day, so give yourself a break. How you interact with other humans will determine and define, how you live, weather you yourself are happy, and ultimately (if you are lucky and persistent) a mate. I wish I was young and thin and (relatively) handsome again. I see guys sometimes and think "OMG I would love to get to know him." Then I remember I'm old enough to be his Grandfather! Talk about a reality check! If you want friends, be a friend; if you want a lover, be loving yourself. Whatever (or whoever) you do, do it with kindness and love and I assure you that happiness and YOUR Prince (or Princess) Charming will come as surely as tomorrow's dawn.
“Think: strength over size. Health over hairlessness. Confidence over categories.”
As always beautifully written and so true. All bodies are beautiful!
As I older gay person I grew up in a post AIDS generation world were most of the generation before me passed away but the legacy they left was one of sexual liberation and excess to some extent. Labels like bear, otter, twink, passing, gender fuck etc… were common and placed people in roles. Today people are placed in roles like masculinity roles like bottom or top mostly and I see daddy applied to guys in their 20’s and the term use to mean an older more mature male. So terms really mean nothing now because they have become confused and misunderstood over time and are only meaningful in a sexual context. Once outside of that context, once you find your person then those terms do not mean as much as they once did unless you’re living an open lifestyle or on the DL. People are just people and if you are open to others you might find out you have things in common and might become friends or more over time. Just random thoughts here.